Pregnant Woman, found object, by Michael Duchamp Newberry

A Drive By

Yesterday, I was driving the five minute rural road from my mountain studio to our village. I was on the way to get Zoom Spout Oiler, because I choose a 90 degree August day to reenergize the rotating fan blades of my bathroom’s vintage heater. Successfully, I might add. Along the way, on the side of the road suspended by a pole was this white plastic white-shaped object that resembled an abstract torso of a pregnant woman. After passing it I looked through the rearview mirror to see its backside and recognized that it was a toddler’s bathtub. Bang! Several postmodern aesthetic patterns all smashed together in my head.

I immediately pulled over, looked both ways, made a U-turn, drove back the 3 or 4 houses, another U-turn, and shot the above pic. What I had just discovered would be an 80 Million dollar postmodern sculpture that would rival Duchamp’s Urinal (The Fountain) and Picasso’s Bull’s Head.

Pregnant Woman by Michael Duchamp Newberry has all of the classic postmodern elements: a found object, worthless, unconventional artistic medium, temporal (long past its sell by date), conceptually repurposed, and butt ugly (though the Picasso is beautiful in an elegant way, but he really wasn’t a true postmodernist, aesthetically a bit of a hypocrite though.)

The only things missing are multi-million dollar showrooms, the State Department patronism, [in Star Trek one of the tactics is to self-destruct as long as you take down your enemy but save your planet. In this case the State Department and the CIA destroy art as a symbol of freedom and answer to communist propaganda art1, destroying American culture and leaving Russia and China laughing their asses off at how incredibly stupid Americans are to buy into this shit.2 Meanwhile China and Russia are rubbing their hands in delight as it can’t be long before an America promoting this shit implodes.] I regress, only things missing continued are postmodern alchemy of turning shit into millions, money launders, pedophile patrons, contemporary art museums, the New York Times Art Section, and the artist with the vision to it off.

I could be that artist but the cost of the degradation is too high—living death is really not on my table. Though it is perfect for all living dead that pose as artists in our postmodern world.

But, back to the Pregnant Woman by Michael Duchamp Newberry. It really is brilliant and conveys things like a pregnant woman is just bath container bathing the fetus in body fluids.

Cleverness without skill, hands on effort, heart, and integrity is a dead end. Some may get a rush from conning others and themselves, but come on, everyone knows BS when they see it, but some secretly just want to get away with stuff. That is why the story of the Emperor’s New Clothes keeps popping up in reference to postmodern museum shows.

We will never know of how many lives of real artists were destroyed by the State Department’s propagation of the postmodern psychopathic 75 year experiment. I’d guess in the millions, and all the genius artists that never were. Also I am not certain whether it was done with full intent, if not, then there are a lot, a lot of morons in the State Dept. And, if so, then there are a lot of sociopaths running it. Nice choice: morons or sociopaths running every aspect of our lives down to indoctrinating children with postmodernism. Sick fucks.